The "Good v. Bad" Food Dogma that's Keeping You from Achieving Your Health Goals

I love glazed crullers from NYC coffee carts. Like, love 'em. If you live in NYC like me, you know the carts I'm talking about:  they're everywhere! You can find them on almost every corner in the City, selling everything from piping hot coffee to buttered rolls to baklava. They're the bomb.com. My favorite cart proprietor knows my order even before I open my mouth! #noshameinmydonutgame.

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I don't remember how I got on my cruller-kick, but they are in the regular circulation of indulgences that I enjoy. I know, I know, you're probably thinking: what in the world is a fitness professional doing eating a cruller from a coffee cart?! Well, I'll let you in on a little-known secret: we "fitness professionals" are *gasp* not immune to the magical combination of sugar and butter, nor are many of us willing to sacrifice the foods that we truly enjoy in order to walk around at 12% body fat. Now don't get me wrong: if that were my goal, I'd definitely rein in the weekly donut indulgence. There's also nothing inherently wrong with wanting to be super-lean...as long as it's not at the sake of your quality of life and mental stability. Ultimately, I know what it takes to lean out to that extent, and that a weekly donut habit would hinder such a goal. However, that's not where I'm at now, so I see no problem with enjoying every satisfying and decadent bite of donut without a twinge of guilt. 

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Now believe me: it's taken me along time to get to the point where I can eat a donut and not hate myself for it. I've come a long way, and doing the tough mental work required to manage my emotional eating has been nothing short of the biggest struggle of my life so far. Part of getting mindful about food, however, involves actively rejecting almost EVERYTHING I used to believe about food and what I should and should not be eating. This daily struggle was the source of endless anxiety for me, until I realized that most of what the conventional industry preaches is a crock of s**t.

I hate the way the fitness industry demonizes certain foods as "bad" and labels others as "good." I think this sends an incomplete message to people who are trying to take control of their health and overcome unhealthy attachments to food. As far am I'm concerned, speaking about something like food in moralistic terms such as these accomplishes the following:

1) Alienates people 

2) Makes people obsessed

3) Facilitates the diet cycle, where you're either "on" or "off"

4) Undermines the efforts of those individuals who've found an alternative to the "hamster wheel" version of dieting where you're constantly moving but not getting anywhere fast. 

Social media is replete with fit pros who post nothing other than half-naked selfies, protein shake recipes, and photos of their boiled chicken breast and asparagus spears. Their preachy posts and hashtags are a dime a dozen. If you're not saying anything different, how is that inspiring? IMO, it leaves something to be desired because 1) it's old hat; and 2) who relates to an automaton who has the perfect diet, physique, attitude, and never struggles?! After all, let's be honest with each other here: EVERYONE--including the out-of-shape person following these IG feeds in search of inspiration--knows what to do to get in shape. But those glistening abs, perky booty, and bland-a$$ food pics are not what is going to motivate that person to commit to changing her lifestyle. What it will do is inspire her temporarily to workout, meal prep, and stay motivated until...her willpower inevitably fails and she eat a cheeseburger and fries. Then she feels guilty, and resorts to excessive exercise to get back on track and feel good about herself again. After two hours on the treadmill, she's starving (duh) and reaches for a bagel...then the guilt returns.

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This cycle is perpetuated when such an individual feels as though her self-worth is tied to whether she's able to keep up her "diet" or not. If she slips up and eat something "bad," she's bad. If she's nailing her workouts and eating her Tupperware meals religiously, she's good. Unfortunately for her, willpower is not an infinite resource so when it inevitably runs out and she can't stay on her super-strict diet anymore, she will blame herself. She will not have the skills to look at what happened objectively, and instead of blaming the "black-or-white" approach, she'll blame herself. That she was me for so. many. damn. years. While I'm no longer immune to all food-related remorse, it's always short-lived and never reflected back on me as an indication of my worthiness as a human being. This is what I want all women who are struggling with food-related anxiety to be capable of: separating their value as a person from their food choices. And as long as we perpetuate this idea that some foods are good while others are bad, we will be stuck in this cycle that evaluates us based on what we do or don't put in our mouths. 

This is why I think my "bad" habit of eating a donut once a week serves me and in fact helps me to stay the course. Building these cheats into my day and/or my week keeps me from feeling deprived and helps me control the urge to binge. I know that 80% of my diet is protein, vegetables, and fiber to keep me full, satisfied and my blood sugar stable, so that I can play around with that 20%. For some people, it works better to spread that 20% out over the course of the day by adding in a little dietary fat here and there or extra starch. Others may find it more psychologically-pleasing to save up the 20% and enjoy a couple glasses of wine; a piece of cake; or a donut every once in a while. Ultimately, what works for you is what you'll do. Don't be discouraged if you slip up several times before you get the hang of it because remember: this is about learning how to eat forever. It's not a quick fix, detox, or 21-day cleanse. The theory of #moderation365 is that since there's never a deadline, there's never a final goal which allows you to fall into enjoyment with the process of living healthier. It gives you ample berth to make mistakes, try new things, experiment and slowly develop resilience to overcome the "good/bad dogma" that has been keeping you from living your best, without food-related guilt. After all, what's a couple of years spent practicing and honing a skill that will serve you for the rest of your life?!

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