3 Strategies to Help You Avoid Overeating at Restaurants (While Still Enjoying Yourself!)

In the first season of The Real Housewives of New York, Jill Zarin tells her daughter a story a story in which she was out to eat, and in order to stop herself from eating all the french fries on her plate, she drenched them in water. While I disagree with the context in which this story was shared with her daughter, as I believe it underscored Jill's attempt to control her daughter's eating habits specifically and her body more generally, her tale resonated with me. I'm sure it also rang true for other women who've done the same or equally absurd things to keep themselves from overeating when they're out to eat.

Even Real Housewives aren't immune to hot, oily, salty
goodness :-)

Self-Portrait: The Time I Threw Away Half a Cake...and then
proceeded to dig it out of the garbage and eat it anyway

Many women struggle with overeating in general, but it can be particularly difficult to rein oneself in when sitting at a restaurant. First of all, the portions are often very large; much larger than what we would typically serve ourselves at home. Secondly, the food is often prepared with a lot of butter, salt and other flavors that trigger the pleasure centers of our brain, making it hard to stop eating simply because we're full. Thirdly, many of us struggle to reconcile 1) the notion that it's wasteful not to clean our plates with 2) our best intentions to eat mindfully.

It looked appetizing at first...but after bite 1,000, I'm feeling
a little bit ill...can you feel me?!

For me, the struggle not to overeat at restaurants is real. I love dining out and I love food, but I hate the lack of control that I feel when I don't take my time and instead eat until I'm busting at the seams (Having to unbutton your pants after a meal? Not a good look!). To help me stay true to my intentions and my goals, I've come to rely on a few strategies to avoid overeating at restaurants:


1) Don't order an alcoholic beverage when the server first comes around for a drink order: Going out to dinner is exciting! Whether it's date night, an evening out on the town with girlfriends, or a special celebration with family, it's tempting to want to "get the party started," so to speak, as soon as you're seated. When we do this, however, we make it that much harder to remain mindful around food because our mind is already slightly clouded by alcohol. When we order a cocktail or glass of wine right off the bat, it's an implicit invitation to ourselves to disregard our intentions and give into those voices that are telling us to "just let loose."

Don't order a Scorpion Bowl until AFTER they bring your
egg roll :-)

In my experience, that initial drink order will either make or break my evening. I've made the wrong-for-me decision too many times to not have developed an alternative solution which is to wait until my meal comes to order a beverage. By ordering plain or sparkling water to start, I make a conscious choice to ease myself into the evening, stay present and enjoy the whole experience. I feel empowered when I make choices that reflect my goals, and as a result, I am able to fully engage with my company. I'm not worried about whether or not someone is "judging" me for abstaining from alcohol (not that my choice gives them reason to, but it's all about my perception anyway!) because I simply say, "I'm going to order a glass of wine with my meal." Not only am I making a choice I feel comfortable with and that allows me to remain fully engaged in the present moment, but I give myself more time to pore over the wine list (<--see what I did there?!) in conjunction with the menu and decide what wine best pairs with my meal of choice. I stand by this strategy as a way to help me avoid overindulgence because it enhances the entire experience of dining out, and when I am truly enjoying myself, I am much less likely to make a decision that will dramatically alter that course.


2) Order two appetizers instead of an entree: This is my go-to strategy to avoid over-eating at restaurants because it accomplishes two goals: 1) The amount of food I am presented with is less, so there's less food to worry about eating; and 2) I get to sample more than one dish, thus satisfying my taste for variety! For me, this is a game-changer.

Yummy apps + more choices = Hilary's a happy girl!

How often have you gone out to eat and ordered a drink, an appetizer, an entree, and dessert, only to regret it once that last bite of dessert crosses your lips? I think that many of us approach dining out with a scarcity mindset: that is, we think that we're never going to be at this restaurant again, or in this same situation again, so we have to try everything right.this.second. When we approach the experience from this mindset, we give ourselves permission to overindulge from the outset which is not a good place to be when we're struggling to be more mindful around food. Scarcity mindset + new restaurant = increased likelihood for overindulgence...if we're not careful. Opting for two appetizers gives you the best-case scenario to indulge your desire to try a couple different things while staying aligned with your core values and goals. It is very tempting to make a dining experience about the food and only the food, but I would argue that this is a mindset that can get us into trouble. In fact, I would argue that you're more likely to return to a restaurant if you associate the event with the anticipation, ambiance, conversation, and all the things about the experience that did not have anything to do with the food! Remember: There's always an opportunity to return to try something else off the menu! You don't have to eatallthethings right now!

3) Order half of the entree in a to-go container so you're not tempted to eat more than you need/want: I've encountered this recommendation in so many articles that it almost seems like a cop out to mention it here. However, I think that there is wisdom in this advice because it's not the most intuitive strategy to employ, nor is it the easiest. It requires that we actually take responsibility for our choices and state our needs aloud. This can be really intimidating to do, especially if you're dining with people who maybe "don't get" your lifestyle or believe in the "all-or-nothing" approach when it comes to dieting. In my experience, it can be less daunting to ask for a to-go container once the food arrives instead of when everyone is ordering and all the focus is on that.  We do sort of put ourselves on blast when we speak up at that time, but...perhaps that's the best opportunity to praxtice being vocal about our needs and desires!

Your friend when dining out!

In fact, I'm going to do just that the next time I go out to dinner with friends. I will face my fears head-on (What are my friends going to say? Will I be ridiculed for asking for half my dinner in a to-go box? Will my friends make fun of me? What will I say in response?) and most likely realize that there was nothing to fear in the first damn place :-) What about you?!?!

Next time you go out to eat and feel like you might be tempted to overeat, try one of these strategies and let me know how it goes. As always, I love to hear from you! xoxo